Who am I?
I am the beneficent guardian of benkbrady.com. All posts, comments, and shares sift through my hands like sand in the OurGlass.
What personal data am I collecting?
Comments
Your comments are incredibly important to the health of my site. Without them I do not know where I stand among the media. This site is for smiling, sharing, and commenting, and buddy, if you aren’t smilin’ or sharin’ then ye best be commenting!
An anonymized string created from your email address (also called a hash) may be provided to the Gravatar service to see if you are using it. The Gravatar service privacy policy is available here: https://automattic.com/privacy/. After approval of your comment, your profile picture is visible to the public in the context of your comment.
Media
Uploaded images are highly recommended! I always find it easier and more exciting to read a picture than text.
Contact Forms
If you want to be contacted about new benkbrady updates, posts, and events (last year no one turned up to the 1st Annual benkbrady.com-a-thon where I told stories about my friends and told dirty limericks) fill out your information in the Contact YOU section, which can be found in the Footer Menu.
Why should YOU sign up for my contact list? Well look at what you missed out on last year at the 1st Annual benkbrady-a-thon — stories like:
I have this friend who we will call Alex and Alex had this buddy in college who I will call Joe and Joe was moving into his freshman dorm when he was a freshman (duh) and he noticed that his roommate wasn’t in the room but all of his stuff (the roommate’s) was still unpacked on his (the roommate’s) bed. Not really weird, whatever. So Joe moves in and unpacks all of his stuff and gets settled in (whatever) and still the roommate hasn’t shown up and his stuff is still unpacked on his (the roommate’s) bed. ‘OK whatever’, Joe thinks. ‘I’m going to go get some food because I am hungry’. OK whatever, makes sense. So he goes and eats and then he hangs out or whatever and he comes back and it’s late and he’s sleepy so he is going to go to bed (hopefully it has been 2 hours since he ate, because you really don’t want to go to bed without digesting, ha ha). Still, though, the roommate’s unpacked stuff is on his (the roommate’s) bed. So Joe goes to sleep and he is hears a weird noise and he thinks it’s nothing probably just college kids horsing around, whatever, but he hears it again and suddenly he see that the closet door in his room opens and out steps his roommate who quickly snatches something off of his bed (the roommate’s), returns to the closet, and shuts the door behind him. A real life scary story.
Add your information in the Contact YOU section if you want hear the end of this crazy story at the 2nd Annual benkbrady-a-thon: “This Year Let’s Get Tropical!”
You also missed out on something like this!
There once was a man named O’Doul
Who saw little red spots on his tool
His doctor, a cynic,
Said “Get out of my clinic!
And wipe off that lipstick you fool!”
Who we share your data with
The highest bidder.
How long we retain your data
Forever! Everyday you use plastic forks and plastic knives in the cafeteria and you “recycle” them and pay no mind. They are transported to one of the world’s premium trash islands where your trash will outlive you!
Secondary caption: “Oop my Uber is here XD”
Where do I send your data?
We harvest your data with our Privacy Scythes of Enlightenment and feed them to our young and skilled team of data analysts, data architects, data scientists, data engineers, business analysts, business insight analysts, operational insight analysts, and sales team. From there it is shipped on our Flat Beds of Unity and stored in our Silos of Secrecy for later use.
If you care to see our silos first hand you can reach me at silokeeper1996@gmail.com to schedule a tour.
Additional information
Questions about when my next post will be up? Interested in interning as a data analyst? Want to send me your favorite YouTube video? Go to the Contact ME page, found in the Footer Menu, and follows the steps!
